Walking in the Light Together

Last week I read a chapter from Tramp for the Lord by Corrie ten Boom. For those of you who have had even one significant conversation with me in the last 2 years, you know how much I respect and appreciate the words of admonishment this sister has to offer. Well, I was reading through the chapter titled, "Walking in the Light". Corrie had sorted through both her own luggage as well as the luggage of her companion, Conny, due to weight restrictions on the baggage they were trying to ship to their next destination. They had to decide what was essential to take, and what could be shipped back home. Conny felt her own feelings infringed upon when Corrie jumped in and sorted her stuff, but did not say anything to Corrie for a week. She kept being reminded that she had promised Corrie several weeks earlier to always walk in the light together. I guess she knew she hadn't been doing that by keeping what was bothering her to herself. Finally, after confiding her mind to Corrie, and after Corrie apologized for her thoughtlessness over the luggage, Corrie had to confront Connie with something that was nagging at her: She was troubled that Conny had not told her the problem right away so that it could have been settled on the spot and that darkness would not have been carried around for a whole week. She urged Conny to never again let the sun go down with a misunderstanding between them. Corrie says that from that moment on they walked in the light together and were always frank with each other.


What I was thinking after reading this was that I am so like Conny when it comes to confronting pretty much anyone in the church. I don't feel moved to bring up something I am struggling with concerning a brother or sister. Sometimes the reason is simply that I want to avoid conflict at all costs. It doesn't seem worth the grief I know will most likely arise. I have plenty of past examples of failures to spur this lie on. Not to mention, I am fearful of severing friendships and creating awkward situations in the face of conflict.

Other times, I convince myself that I must surely be too sensitive and that the only reason I am struggling with whatever, is because my own flesh is bleeding through and I am not being tolerant nor striving toward peace with the particular person. I tell myself, what I really need to do is pray for a heart for this person and ask the Lord to give me love and patience, and to take away all the selfishness that is creating this "hurt" in me. This lie has gained impetus lately as my awareness of flesh increases.

Then, there is the hypocritical, the "who do you think you are?" argument in which I tell myself I have done the same thing a million times and have no right bringing that one up to a brother or sister. Let's be honest, if we lived according to the rules of that game, there would only be those rebuking in arrogance because they haven't struggled with the particular thing while everyone else who has struggled with it would be shut up tighter than a clam. That can't be right.

And finally, as in Conny's situation, I sometimes feel that the person I am having an "issue" with is much more godly than me and the relationship of "iron sharpening iron" does not exist between us. I don't have a right to butt in and question them. Whatever my rationale of the moment, (and I am pretty good at convincing myself when the time comes) I believe it is most always not the Lord, but myself fueling my desire to flee from conflict.

Lord, only you know how I hate confrontation, how I would choose any other way than to bring up a struggle with one of your children. You know how I have run from your gentle urgings in the past. You know my rationalizations, how clever they are. And you know all of the times I pushed you aside in fear of the consequences. Show me how to trust you and how to consider the cross when I need to approach another person. Give me a heart of humility and unconditional love in all of my dealings with your people. Show me how to look on your face to find the words. Fill me with boldness to obey you and give me a Spirit that is willing to go wherever you lead..no matter the consequences. Amen!